I have suspected it for a while but a recent driving trip through to Glasgow has proved it – I have my own particular form of internal GPS – Global Pisstaking System. Geography is not my strong point, especially when it’s a) dark, b) underground or c) a month with an ‘R’ in it. Never has so much nervous energy been used up in so (reasonably) short a journey. Next week I’m taking Kendal mint cake and a flare gun.

Random bit of trivia: Did you know that the most popular names for those of the swinging persuasion are Paul and Catherine?


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